Called but not qualified

I’ve worked in several different  jobs in my career. Some felt intimidating at first. There’s a learning curve. New people to interact with. New data to grow expertise around. New processes to implement. The new can be both exciting and daunting.

But never have I felt so unqualified for a critical task as being a new mom. We don’t typically spend 18 years at school preparing for parenthood. There are no midterm exams to study for. At best, most new parents are armed with knowledge from a few books that they don’t yet understand and some parenting classes from the local hospital.

Then suddenly miraculously, a new life is born. And you are in love and you are overwhelmed.  There is so much responsibility. So many questions. So many diapers.

Today is first day alone with my daughter. I look at her sweet face and think: what exactly do I do with you all day? How do I help you nap when you’re supposed to and eat the right amount? What kind of play will interest you? How do I learn your cues so I can help you be happy?

I imagine in a few weeks, months, years, I will look back on this time and wonder why I was so worried, thanks to the perspective that comes from time and wisdom.

For now, I must trust that God will qualify those he calls.