Comparison Robs Joy
This morning my three-year-old spent at least an hour playing creatively by herself. Granted, the living room has a lot of toys out now, but it was well worth the time I got to spend doing what I needed/wanted to do.
And it got me thinking how different my Sundays might feel if this was (becomes??) a normal occurrence.
I remembered that morning energy and evening energy are different for me. Focus time energy and scattered energy-while trying to multitask, entertain, handle interruptions-are different for me.
It’s easy to have expectations of what life should look like. It sounds something like this: My house should be clean. I should be at church each week. I should cook dinner each night. My kids need more play dates. We should have date night once a month….etc
And while expectations may reflect goals or wishes, they don’t always reflect the reality of a current situation. Consider: Your kids age and number, your work responsibilities, your health, your families health, your kid’s personalities and expectations of you, and generally your life stage.
- Just because you could do something the past, doesn’t mean you can now, or that you won’t be able to in the future.
- Just because your friend in similar life stage can do something, doesn’t mean you can.
- And for sure, just because the internet world can (pretends to) do something, doesn’t mean you can or should.
My mom always says, “Comparison robs us of joy.” And I think there is a lot of truth in this. Comparison can give us ideas. Comparison can provide empathy. But no one has the same exact story or situation as you. So simply, comparison is rarely accurate.
So, when managing expectations of yourself, consider all the ingredients that make up your present reality, and be kind to yourself. Do your best for today. And when tomorrow comes, with all its tomorrow factors, you can do your best then too.
